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I wish I had supernatural powers that enable me “hear” what people think about me, even when they are miles away. I wish I could read everyone’s feelings and know where they place me on their friend list. I wish I could have the power to catch a liar, know immediately when they start lying to me. That will help me know who my real friends are. This will allow me get many longer spoons so that I can conveniently dine with the many devils around me. Oh, how sweet life will be…

Then what!

There are many things you don’t know and thank God you don’t know them. You should pray never to know them. Venturing into the unknown can be fun, but not with human emotions. Humans have always been, and will always be humans. We are full of flaws and imperfection in many ways, even in the things we do best. We treat people badly, even the ones we love most. We take sides with situations or persons against others so that we can gain favors or accomplish selfish desires easily.

If you knew how much people say things, and the type of things they say behind your back, then you will wish you never had a friend. But then, remains this mysterious question; why would my best friend say or do something against me in my absence? I hold strong to the fact that experience is the best teacher. If you have ever said or done anything against a friend in his/her absence, I presume you remember your motive(s). But before we go into that, let’s consider, by way of approach, two types of people.

There are some people who are always upright and straight to the point. Whether they are your friends or not, they are not afraid of you. They care less about how their actions and speeches affect your emotions even when they think it is for your own good. They don’t compromise. They never stand by you when you are wrong. They offer little or more compliments. They will always be ready to lend a hand, but must know why they are in for it, and how their actions will benefit you.

Contrary to the above is another group of people who appear to be the best angels around you. Those can be at the extremes; your very best friends or deadliest enemies. They appear never to take chances hurting your emotions. They take side you in every situation when you are watching. They offer their help without hesitation and never seen to inquire where you are heading. People of such nature hardly advise you because they are afraid of saying anything contrary to your thoughts and ideas. Because such people will hardly face you, they say and do things behind your back so that you don’t get to see or hear.

People of the former group are usually considered your best friends while those of the later are called names such as gossipers, backstabbers or eye servants. However, there is one thing I think we should reconsider. Must everything said or done behind your back be negative or harmful to you? Must the ones engaging into such necessarily be your enemies? No!

Some sincere friends may fear that you won’t allow them do something for you (even for your own benefit for certain reasons), or you may agree but try to limit them. In such cases, they choose to do them in your absence or without your knowledge. This goes same with speech. They may be afraid with the way you face the truth about sensitive maters, so they tend to meet either someone more mature or courageous to face you.

It is god to always take precaution, but nonetheless, we should allow the people that are close to us some freedom so that they can always express themselves. When we do so, we tend to get the best out of them without even knowing.